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I’m currently interested in pursuing a relationship with a Gemini male who is about a year and a half older than me. We started out being great friends in high school, then I left for college and we didn’t hear from each other again for about five years. I recently moved back home after graduating and we met up again. All of a sudden, we were very attracted to each other, even though we had only been friends before. - Amanda, Pacific NW
Amanda, thanks very much for your question. I’ll let you carry on, because it was long and involved…
We have great meaningful philosophical conversations and we flirt a lot and use a lot of sexual innuendo in conversation. We both also enjoy creative writing and go on many flights of fantasy in conversation (or in general). I graduated with a degree in physics, but am currently unemployed and looking for a job. He is still working on his degree and takes time off to work to earn money to pay for it, which I think is noble. He is focused on English, but he also studies many languages, philosophy, religion, and Asian studies, so he’s not terribly focused, but he’s very smart and driven just as I am. We are both also very introverted and very self critical. My problem is that he is very indirect and changes the subject if I try to have a conversation about what type of relationship we have or want to have. How can I get him to open up, or should I just go with the flow and not say anything? Also, do you think this would be a successful pairing?
This is an interesting question, because you don’t give your star sign. Fair enough, you’re entitled to your privacy! Now, I’m not surprised that your Gemini man is being evasive. Many Geminis aren’t particularly comfortable with their feelings, and discussions about relationships, and where they should be going, might be confusing for them. And although he’s a year and a half older than you (meaning you’re a Scorpio, Sagittarius or Capricorn?), it’s seems that you’re the one who is more mature and more experienced, at least in the context of this pairing.
Usually when people come to me with this kind of question, the answer is no. When people reach the stage where they need to consult an astrologer, there’s a suggestion that it’s wishful thinking and nothing else. However in this case I’m quite optimistic.
I set up a horoscope for when I read and understood your question, and the chart was OK without being brilliant, and I think there is a degree of choice here. If you really want your Gemini, and you’re prepared to be very patient, you can have him.
Now, when I set up the chart, there had just been a New Moon. By definition, the New Moon is when the Moon is conjunct the Sun. In the chart your Gemini is represented by the Moon, and I think that right now he is shy, and also distracted. There are things on his mind, and he doesn’t feel ready for a full-blown relationship.
Also, the Moon is in a sector of the chart connected to routine work, and that fits in with what you say about him. He want to study, but he also wants to support himself, and he might regard a relationship as being an over-load.
Yet I do think that your Gemini is keen on you. Perhaps, believe it or not, keener on you than you are on him. And if the relationship doesn’t happen, it might be your decision and not his. So, the question is, are you prepared to wait for him? I don’t believe that there is any other woman in his life - except perhaps someone who is having a weakening influence on him, who is receding into the past - and I doubt very much, in the foreseeable future, that you’ll have any competition.
So, in the mean-time, what’s the best strategy? You feel that there’s nothing you can do, and perhaps you should just chip away at the edges. Make sure you support him, in whatever he’s doing, and provide him with lots of security.
To repeat, it’s your choice. You may be exasperated by his indecision, and you may, and probably will, decide that enough is enough. But if you really want a relationship with your Gemini, then I’m confident that your desires can be fulfilled.
I am a Gemini. I am currently interested in a Pisces who is about 7 years older than me. Is this wrong? Will it work out? If not can you please tell me my love forecast and if I will meet someone special and what my future holds for me? - Courtney, USA
Thanks very much for your question. You have just had your birthday, and you’ve turned sixteen. While it’s true that in the United Kingdom the age of consent is sixteen, in many US states it is higher. So I can’t condone or encourage behaviour which might conceivably lead to the breaking of the law.
As far as your Gemini star sign is concerned, you probably shouldn’t spend too long reading up about it. You are not, I don’t think, a typical Gemini. You mentioned, in an earlier email, that you can be affected by romantic movies, and I notice that in your chart you have the Moon in Pisces and Mercury in Cancer. Pisces and Cancer are both Water signs, and Water signs are focused on the feelings. So as Geminis go, you’re going to be more emotional than average.
You asked about your love life. Well, you’re only sixteen! You don’t have to worry about it! Still, your horoscope indicates that when you’re good and ready you find romantic satisfaction. After all, you have Venus, the planet of love, in Taurus, which is a very fortunate placing. Furthermore, your Venus is in mutual reception by exaltation to the Moon. Sorry about the jargon, but Venus is in Taurus, the sign where the Moon is exalted, while the Moon is in Pisces, the sign where Venus is exalted. This combination is extremely lucky. It also makes you attractive and charismatic, the kind of woman that many men would go crazy for.
However one word of warning. In a female horoscope, the Moon sign often describes the personality more than the Sun sign. So as you’ve got the Moon in Pisces, you might in some respects be more Pisces than Gemini - especially as you grow older, and move into your twenties.
There’s a certain tendency for Piscean women to martyr themselves for the sake of a relationship, to feel that they have to go out of their way to make their man happy. It’s therefore going to be very important that you look after your own vital interests, that you use your natural sensitivity to work out which men are worth bothering with.
In the mean time, enjoy your teens and don’t allow yourself to be pressurised - particularly by the prevalent propaganda, that puts love and romance on a pedestal. And right now I believe you’ve got better things to do than hang out with a man who is seven years older than you.
I am a Taurus and my husband is a Sagittarius. When will we have a second child? We have a daughter of 3 and half years old. - Anita, Hyderabad
Anita, thanks very much for your question. I set up a horoscope for the time I received it. This branch of astrology has particular rules, and according to these rules, the chart doesn’t give an answer. In the jargon, the ascendant was too late, so judgement wasn’t possible.
So the chart tells me nothing, and I mean that. If you want to ask the question again, that’s fine, but maybe you shouldn’t, not for astrological reasons, but for psychological ones.
One thing I’m pretty sure about, is that fertility isn’t just a biological matter. It’s also psychological. And sometimes the more you want something, the less easy it is to get. If you’re thinking about the second child all the time, you could be stressing yourself out. And your worries could translate into something physical, that makes it more difficult to conceive.
And on the issue of when you’re going to have a second child, I would suggest that you don’t consult astrologers, and that includes me, because such consultations could add to your worries, and actually increase the amount of time it takes you to get pregnant again.
So, I think you and your husband should stop worrying about when you’re going to have a second child, and enjoy the family life that you already have. Though of course if you find yourselves waiting too long, make sure that you both consult a good doctor, and have the necessary tests.
As for asking the question again, I would suggest that you don’t. Because, as I’ve already said, I’m not sure that astrology is going to be helpful. However if you really want to ask again I would suggest that you wait at least a couple of months, and when you do, can you please give me the details of your time, date and place of birth, which won’t be mentioned in my reply to you.
(more…)
Over many months, I have been struggling with the best direction in my career. What seemed to be a bright star in a creative direction has quickly become a frustrating choice with today’s economy. I was finally tapping into my creative talent and going full gusto and I now find myself feeling that I made a mistake. My knowledge of astrology is fairly advanced and maybe it is more difficult (for me) to read the charts pertaining to myself. - Kathy, Florida
Kathy, thanks a lot for your question. I think a lot of people can relate to your frustration in today’s economic climate. We do what we’re good at, and we nonetheless hit a brick wall, and start regretting our past choices.
In once sense we’re all part of the collective, and however good our horoscopes, our fortunes could suffer.
Of course that’s not really the point. You’ve hit an obstacle, and you want to get round it. And perhaps your knowledge of astrology can give you a competitive advantage. So I won’t fob you off with pleasantries - I’ll look at why you might continue to fail, and also what you can do to be successful, in your own terms.
As you’re interested in astrology, my reply is going to be fairly technical - this will perhaps demonstrate to other readers how an astrologer thinks about a horoscope. Though my approach mightn’t be typical!
My starting point is the kind of world that you were born into. At the time of your birth there was an exact Uranus-Pluto conjunction. It was a dramatic influence, that helped define the mid and late 1960s. The urge for freedom and transformation, which marked a generation.
It might seem far away, but you are trying to express it - especially as your Mars is making a 90-degree aspect to this conjunction. You’re struggling to be free, to find your own way of being, but it isn’t easy. And to an extent you might be afraid of your own potential.
This Mars really is important, because it’s your ruling planet - you have Scorpio rising, and being fairly traditional, I don’t recognise Pluto as being ruler of this sign.
Right now your Mars is under a certain amount of pressure, because of Saturn’s transit. Saturn made a stressful aspect to it in October of last year, which it will repeat next month, in other words in April, and also in June. So it’s a frustrating time for you, when you really feel that you can’t express yourself. And as you’ve already said, your career, your prime means of creative self-expression, is being affected by the economic crisis.
I think you need to deal with this situation very carefully, and you shouldn’t jump to conclusions, or do anything that’s extreme. After all, in your chart you have Mars aspecting the Uranus-Pluto midpoint, being triggered by transitting Saturn. You mustn’t feel that you can force the pace, especially in your career, and you must instead find a way of expressing yourself that’s healthy and wholesome.
When I give advice to people, I try not to get spiritual for the sake of it. It’s easy for astrologers to suggest that their clients get spiritual, because people who consult astrologers are usually sympathetic to that kind of advice. However in your case I think some serious spirituality could be good for you, provided you remain grounded. And maybe something quite physical, like Tai Chi, would be suitable.
We’re now moving towards a major contradiction in your horoscope, which needs to be resolved. The spiritual side of things is strongly emphasised. Indeed you can profit from areas that other people are weary of. This is because the Sun, the ruler of your Tenth House of career, is in the Eighth House, which as you probably know, is connected with the darker side of life. So if you had said that you were a medium, depth psychologist or funeral director I wouldn’t have been surprised.
On the other hand, you have the South Node of the Moon in the First House, in Scorpio, conjunct Neptune. In astrology the South Node represents the past, and it’s also what we feel most comfortable with. Most importantly, it’s something that we need to be moving away from.
You have a tendency to make things too intense, to regard the world as being a heavy place. And very often sharing can be difficult - there are things you want to keep to yourself, and trust doesn’t come easily.
This means that when dealing with spiritual and psychological stuff, including astrology, you have to be careful. While it might explain what’s going on in your life, it could also make things more complicated, and could prevent you from taking useful action. Yet spirituality is the way forward, and there’s the contradiction.
What you have to do is work very hard with the South Nodes’s opposite, the North Node. You have the North Node in Taurus, in the Seventh House of relationships, conjunct Venus. It’s tough being in relationships, but it’s probably essential - through close contact with another person you can find yourself, and also achieve your creative potential.
I should say that relationships aren’t just romantic. In terms of your career, you might have to be in a partnership to be successful. That doesn’t of course mean any partnership, but if you ask the right questions, and you listen to your mind and heart, you can find the right person.
Yet romantic happiness might be hindered by the fact that you have, in Indian astrology, kuja dosa. This is very common, and it’s certainly nothing to obsess about. It’s caused by Mars being in the First, Fourth, Eighth or Twelfth House. And some sources say the Sixth House as well.
According to the tradition, a person with kuja dosa will be treated badly by their marriage partner, but will themselves be unable to cause harm. So if you’ve got kuja dosa the best person to have a relationship with is someone who also has this affliction. You might not be attracted to each other, but it’s long-term harmony that matters.
Continuing on the theme of Indian astrology, you’re currently in a period of life ruled by Rahu, which is the South Node of the Moon. This started in late February 2003 and continues until late February 2010. It’s a seven-year period that’s probably been very turbulent, and there might have been extremes of good and bad luck. Though at times you might have been tripped up by your own desires - wanting something too much, and once you’ve got it being saddled with negative results.
This period might have also coincided with a certain tendency to consume things that weren’t healthy. For example, your diet might have had room for improvement. So between now and February 2010, you should perhaps make a special effort to eat the right things and to resist temptation.
In Indian astrology there is a phenomenon known as sadhesati, which relates to Saturn’s transit of the Moon. When looking at transits, from an Indian perspective, you have to remember that we’re dealing with a different Zodiac - the Indian Zodiac is around twenty-four degrees behind the Western one. So your Moon is in the third degree of Cancer. Also, transits cover the whole sign a planet is in - Saturn transits the Moon while it’s in the entire sign of Cancer.
Sadhesati takes things further - the Moon is afflicted while Saturn is in the sign before and after the Moon’s sign, as well as the sign itself. Which means we’re looking at a seven-year transit, lasting on and off from July 2002 through to September 2009 - which happens to be a similar period to your Ketu dasa. The two events are unconnected.
In your Indian chart your Moon is in the Tenth House of career. So it’s likely that sadhesati had a particular effect on your career, and if you’re having career problems now, it’s going to be difficult to sort them out before September.
On February 25 2010 your Ketu dasa ends, and you enter the twenty year dasa of Venus - which will take you through until February 25 2030.
It’s a period than can be fortunate, because Venus is in Taurus, the sign of its rulership. You can make money, and your understanding of financial details will be excellent. And at the same time you’ll be attracting powerful people, who can provide a welcome boost to your prospects.
Going back to Western astrology, from 2012 to 2014 there’s a 90-degree aspect between Uranus and Pluto. This relates back to the conjunction between these two planet, which was in operation when you were born. Whatever started in the mid to late 1960s will go into crisis, and this could be good news, at least for you. Suddenly you will understand what’s happening in the world, and if you handle things in the right way you’ll be in a position to profit.
Finally, I’d like to mention remedies. Between now and February 25 2010, while your Ketu dasa is still operational, it might be a good idea to wear a gemstone that is ruled by this point - for example, an agate or a gomed. Ideally the stone should be worn next to the skin, though I have no idea whether it might cause an allergy or skin irritation.
On February 25 2010, when your Venus dasa starts, you should stop wearing the Ketu gemstone. You might benefit from switching to a Venus one, and ideally that’ll be a diamond. Again, next to the skin.
Also from February 2010 onwards, you should make Friday, the day of Venus, special. On this day have a virtuous lifestyle, and eat moderately. You certainly shouldn’t eat meat on Fridays, and provided it’s not bad for your health, you might want to consider fasting on this day. If you can also do charitable work on Fridays, that would be brilliant!
Im a sagi and he is a capri Im in an on and off relationship since 2years coz we fight n get back together but this time a girl is there who has came in his life and she is trying on him and now i and my bf we talk as friends.what should i do now shud i wait for him or go away from him ??? - Ritika, India
Ritika, thanks for your question, and thanks for making it so compact.
You’re a Sagittarius, your boyfriend is a Capricorn, and you’ve been in an on and off relationship with him for the last two years; and it seems that there is another woman who is interested in him.
Starting off with the psychological dimension, you have to remember that the Sun is a male planet. So women very often project their Sun-sign, and seek partners who have its quality. This means, as a Sagittarius, that you could be looking for Sagittarius-like qualities in your partner.
The sign Sagittarius can enjoy moving from place to place, and can have plans and affections which change on an almost day-to-day basis. At the same time, Sagittarians like variety… and having two or more women on the go simultaneously might be very appealing to them.
I understand that your boyfriend is a Capricorn, and not a Sagittarius. However in some respects he has Sagittarian traits, which you find attractive. Which is why part of you wants to stick with him - even if on a conscious level you’re not happy with a number of these traits!
I set up a chart for the time I read and understood your email. Overall your position is about to change - you’re about to move from a position of weakness to a position of strength. Your boyfriend, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to be strongly placed, and right now he seems indecisive.
Although at the moment you seem to be fonder of him than he is of you, that’s going to change. You’ll look around and you’ll see what’s available, and I think some new friends will start moving into your life. These friends will, in many cases, be reliable and trustworthy.
I believe that your boyfriend will keep sitting on the fence, though just as you think you might be getting closer to him, you’ll meet someone else. A person who is dynamic, who in terms of height is probably shorter than your current boyfriend. He’ll have strong beliefs, will be interested in travelling to foreign countries and will also be interested in sport and exercise.
The world is your oyster!
I am a Sagittarius with Capricorn rising. I lost my job to the recession last March and have been having a hard time getting a new one. Everything basically seems stalled in love and career. I know things are bound to change (hopefully for the best) at some point but how do I escape this getting-stuck-and-walking-through-molasses feeling? I am disconnected from everything I held dear up until last year. Moving across the big pond to make or at least encourage a positive change in my life. But things just aren’t moving as fast or as smoothly as I would like. Do you see this “bad spell” ending any time soon? Thank you - Serena, Dublin
Serena, thanks for you question. You haven’t given me much to go on, aside from telling me your star sign and your ascendant. But that’s fine. I set up a chart for the time I read and understood your question, and I think this gives me enough information.
First of all, you’re over the worst. I got your question a few hours after the Spring Equinox, and Leo was rising - which means that in this horoscope you’re represented by the Sun, which is exalted in Aries. You have recently been in a bad position, as you said in your email, but almost as I write things are changing. Has anything happened in the last day or two that suggests that things are getting better? You’re certainly a lot more dynamic, and you’re prepared to look at possibilities that in the past you might have discounted.
Having said that, I’m not convinced that there is going to be any immediate progress in your career - at the moment it’s going to be very difficult for you to find a job that you’re satisfied with, that makes the most of your many talents.
Still a job is coming your way. It’s not a particularly good job, but that shouldn’t worry you. It’s the start of a new phase, and it’s important that you aren’t too proud. The job is likely to be pretty routine, and the money won’t be great, but that’s not important. What matters is that you’re getting stronger, and I see the next few months as being a period of steady recovery.
You mention that you’re planning, or considering, a move across ‘the big pond’ - in other words, to America. I’m pretty sure that this is a good move - in the horoscope I set up the Sun was in the Ninth House of foreign travel.
Your own circumstances aside, my own astrological view is that Europe is in for a very tough ride over the next few years, and that the period from 2010 to 2012 could be particularly difficult, with political and economic strains threatening to tear the continent apart. I believe that the United States, certainly in relative terms, is a much safer bet.
As far as relationships are concerned, I’m inclined to think that right now they would be a distraction. You’ve got other things to sort out, and if you were to get involved in a close relationship it would be unlikely to satisfy your needs. Or worse still, you might waste a lot of time. Later on, when you’re feeling more confident and more comfortable, you can start focusing on romance.
I’m an Aquarian who has had an on-off relationship with a fellow Aquarian. Our love is strong, and for the past year we have only seen each other a handful of times. That is the main reason for the on-off nature of the relationship. This is a relationship where sparks fly and there is an underlying raw passion. There is also an ex of his that keeps coming back into his life, so that has led me to take a step further back. He’s been hurt by past relationships in his life. Recently, he’s begun taking action towards getting a bit more in touch, including taking a trip up to see me next month. All this as “friends”. So is it possible for two Aquarians to find happiness and do you think that it’s worth hanging in there, or should I walk away from the love aspect and maintain the friendship? - Audrey, Pennsylvania
Audrey, thank you very much for your question. I’m not going to give you a complete answer, or tell you how it’s all going to end up, because right now it’s impossible to be certain, at least from my perspective.
Nonetheless, when two people have the same star-sign, and their birthdays are only a week apart, there’s often going to be a powerful chemistry. They may be very different people, but there’s an invisible link, which keeps pulling them together.
Yet in the case of a male-female relationship, it’s usually the woman who is most affected. This is because the Sun is a male energy, and to an extent will be projected. So your Aquarius Sun represents the kind of man you’re attracted to, and Aquarian men, with a birthday close to your own, will have a special appeal.
From what you say, your partner is more typically Aquarius than you are. As far as I can see, he’s trying to be objective and he wants to be involved with people in a relatively neutral environment, without the confusion and chaos of strong feelings.
As to the current situation, I set up a chart for the time I got your question, and I believe that the situation you are in is about to change - one chapter is very nearly finished, you’re almost on the last sentence, and a new chapter is about to begin. And it’s unlikely that things will pan out as your expect. Matters are made more difficult by the likelihood that you partner is confused, and will soon have to face some kind of challenge, the like of which he might have never faced before.
I don’t think, in the short-term, that you can have much influence over the situation, and you need to be patient. In a few months time you’ll have a clearer idea about the way things are going.
I am an Aquarius with a Gemini boyfriend. We’ve been in love for quite a while now. When we are around each other we cannot seem to keep our hands off each other. We don’t get to see each other often and times spent away from each other emotionally kills us inside. We both know we love each other and care for each other and more, but at times my Gemini boyfriend does not call me at all. It worries me greatly. He does not have his own phone, but he lives with people who do have phones and I don’t understand why he can’t call me everyday. Is this something to be worried about? - Marisa, Ohio
Marisa, thank you for your question. You’ve kept things simple, by not mentioning times and dates of birth - so I can just focus on the star signs.
You’re an Aquarius. In the astrological jargon, it’s a ‘fixed’ sign, along with Taurus, Leo and Scorpio. You sometimes have a fixed view of the way things are going, and you like things to be straightforward. So if people change their plans, or show themselves to be at all unreliable, you can quickly get annoyed. Though if you’re typical of your sign, you might find it difficult to express the full power of you feelings - because Aquarians work best through the head, and not the heart.
Although the Gemini-Aquarius relationship is usually quite good, there is a difference of approach. Geminis don’t have the fixity of Aquarians, and they can change their minds at regular intervals.
Geminis also like to split their various activities - doing one thing in one place, another thing somewhere else. And these two activities are often completely unconnected with each other. This might explain some aspects of your boyfriend’s relationship with you.
He might regard his love life as a sealed compartment, that has little to do with his social life. And he perhaps doesn’t like the two being confused. Which might be why he doesn’t call you.
On an emotional level, you say that you and your boyfriend are very much in love with each other. Yet Geminis, of all the signs, are perhaps the best at separating their thoughts and their feelings. They can often put their feelings to once side, and appear cold and aloof. And when they’re involved in a particular scene, they often become absorbed, and pay little attention to other things - including their relationships!
So given what you’ve said, I doubt that there is much to be worried about, though I’m not making any predictions about the future course of the relationship.
If you pressurise your boyfriend, particularly in a way that’s very emotional, you might cause a lot of damage. After all, Geminis often become uncomfortable when the emotional temperature gets too high.
Having said that, it’s possible that you’re being challenged to define your own boundaries, to find a world where you don’t have to be reliant on other people. This is very important for Aquarians, and perhaps you should do as your boyfriend is doing. Find something to inspire you, that doesn’t need his help or advice. Then you might realise that a relationship is only one part of your life, that there are other things that matter just as much.
Put another way… be an Aquarian!
I’m a Libran married to a Sagittarius man. We are beset with arguments ranging from simple, domestic stuff to ideological ones. We love each other, but find it hard to accept each other’s behaviour and reasoning. Every time I feel we have made progress, I am given a rude surprise that things haven’t changed. It almost feels like we’re going through an obstacle course. The date for our marriage was chosen after consulting astrologers, but I’m now wondering if that has something to do with our non-stop bickering. Also, is there something I can do to improve things? Your advice will be a source of strength to me, and I hope it will bring some sense of calmness in the relationship. I also feel like there’s some force stopping me from reaching my potential, and I am very depressed about it. - Anuradha, India
Anuradha, thank you very much for your question, which brings into play some of astrology’s most important techniques. Looking at individual horoscopes, analysing the way two horoscopes interact, assessing particular events and forecasting the future.
To begin with I’m going to look at your horoscope. From the point of view of Western astrology, you strike me as being a reasonable person. You have five planets in Libra, namely the Sun, Mercury, Jupiter, Saturn and Pluto. You put a great premium on harmony and you don’t like arguments.
I should also say that you don’t have any Water planets in your horoscope (i.e. planets in the signs Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces), unless you count Uranus in Scorpio, which is a generational influence, as it stays in one sign for around seven years. Water is linked with the feelings and I don’t think you’re very comfortable when there are lots of emotions flying around; and you perhaps don’t understand why people can’t talk about things in a rational way.
Looking at your direction in life, I feel that communication is going to be important for you, and you won’t be happy if you’re stuck in the same old place, doing the same old things. Travel could become very important to you, and your general approach to life seems philosophical, and perhaps spiritual as well.
However it’s wrong to think that Librans are always a soft touch. Margaret Thatcher is a Libran, and so is Vladimir Putin, and where necessary Librans know how to upset the balance. Sometimes you need to understand harmony in order to destroy it, and your greatest successes might have disruption at their root.
As far as other people are concerned, it’s a mixed picture. As I’ve already suggested, you’ve got excellent people skills, and your future success will to a large extent depend on your relationships with particular individuals. To take matters further, in your Western horoscope the ruler of your Tenth House of career is Mars, which is in the Seventh House of relationships, conjunct Regulus, the royal star. You can get in contact with important and influential people, who can help you to achieve your aims.
However on the downside, you have an exact conjunction between the Sun and Jupiter. There is some controversy amongst astrologers about whether it’s a good or a bad influence. Jupiter represents the desire to expand, to reach out to things beyond your normal sphere. It can also be very religious. However in your Western horoscope, the Sun rules relationships, and it’s possible that your partner, whoever that might be, tries to prevent you from achieving your potential - so if you get involved in the wrong relationship, you could start feeling claustrophobic and trapped.
Matters aren’t helped by the fact that you have ‘kuja dosa’ - because in your Indian horoscope you have Mars in the Eighth House. I don’t know whether you’ve discussed this matter with astrologers in India, but it’s something to consider before getting involved in a marriage.
Although kuja dosa is very common - up to around 40% of charts will have this affliction - it can without doubt be unfortunate. As a broad generalisation (there are always exceptions!) a person with kuja dosa is incapable of causing their spouse any harm, but will instead suffer through their marriage partner’s actions. This means that people with kuja dosa should marry people with the same condition. Unfortunately two people with kuja dosa are unlikely to be attracted to each other!
Which brings me on to your relationship with your husband. He doesn’t have kuja dosa, so there’s potentially a problem. You are, to some extent, suffering from his actions, in spite of your best efforts to make the marriage work.
As far as why you’re having the problems you’re having, there are a number of possibilities. I think your husband may currently be under pressure. Recently it may have been difficult for him to express himself, and he himself might have felt trapped. Perhaps this was partially to do with his career? Since the Summer of 2007 things probably haven’t been too good for him, and he might have had to deal with significant obstacles. While I believe that the situation should improve from September onwards, there are still some long-term issues to deal with.
You mentioned that you and your husband have had ideological differences, and like you, your husband has an opinion on most things, including religion, politics and philosophy. But your respective opinions can be very different from each other, and could easily clash.
I compared both of your Western horoscopes, and I can’t help noticing that you’re born nearly seven years apart. In astrology this is an important age difference - not because it’s too big or too small, but because it’s linked to the cycle of the planet Saturn. Saturn takes around 29 years to go round the Sun, so the quarter stage of the cycle is about seven years. And in the approximate seven year interval between your birthday and your husband’s, Saturn had moved 86 degrees, which is close to the 90-degrees right angle. So the mini-generations that each of you come from might clash.
Perhaps the mindset of your husband’s mini-generation is quite traditional and inward-looking, while you and your contemporaries are more open-minded, and more sociable? If there’s a political clash, I would guess that your husband is more conservative than you.
Also, your husband’s Saturn makes a stressful, 90-degree aspect to your Sun-Jupiter conjunction, that I referred to earlier. I do think it very likely that he is preventing you from achieving your potential. He probably wants to restrict you, or at least that’s how you see it.
Furthermore, the planet Mars in your horoscope is close to 90-degrees from the Mars in his horoscope. Mars is the planet of conflict, so I think there’ll always be the potential for having arguments.
Looking at the marriage chart, I can’t tell for sure what the reasoning of the astrologers was, but I think I can see why they might have chosen that day. Venus and Mars, the planets representing the male and female energy, were very close to a favourable, 120-degree aspect. And at the time of the marriage they were in strong houses - Mars was in the First House, Venus was in the Ninth House.
I nonetheless believe that the astrologers were taking a risk. Mars, being in the First House in both the Western and Indian marriage charts, could cause significant problems. It makes an aspect to the Seventh House of relationships, and it could be the signature of a marriage that’s beset with arguments. Furthermore, it’s in the Fourth House from the Moon, which probably isn’t conducive to domestic harmony.
As to the future, I do believe that your marriage will see an improvement in September. But that doesn’t mean you’ll be out of the woods. Your husband needs to feel comfortable with his career, and I think he might have to do some work on his Jupiter.
In Indian astrology he is going through his Jupiter major period, which started in 2005 and ends in 2021. Jupiter rules his Tenth House of career, yet it isn’t very well placed.
The usual remedies for a weak Jupiter involve being extra-virtuous on Thursdays (which is the day of Jupiter), saying mantras which are relevant to Jupiter, and wearing the relevant gemstone.
For yourself, you are approaching a big change. Since the beginning of 2004 you have been in a phase of life ruled by the Sun, and this continues until the beginning of 2010. I don’t think that this six-year period is particularly fortunate. There may have problems with men, whether they be relatives, employers or partners. Men who tried to control your life, but who were fundamentally weak. Also, you may have felt a certain powerlessness.
At the beginning of 2010 I believe there will be a big improvement, and over the next ten years, until 2020, you can find happiness, in terms of both relationships and your home. And most importantly, you’ll have the opportunity to achieve your potential.
This coincides with your Saturn Return, when Saturn returns to the place it was when you were born. This takes place from November 2010 through to August 2011. At this stage you’ll understand the mistakes you’ve made in the past, and you’ll also realise what you’re good at. And most importantly you’ll know what you want. Discovering the truth may be tough, but the end result will be fortunate.
Which brings me back to your relationship with your husband. I believe that getting the relationship to work is going to be difficult. It seems that you’re already feeling the effect of your kuja dosa, though remedies do exist to deal with it. I remember a Hindu client coming to see me, who was a Hindu, who was very aware that she had kuja dosa, and she wore a specially made ring to help ward off its negative effects.
Still, it’s going to be difficult to avoid the conflicts that exist between you and your husband’s charts. And you have to be aware that your husband has a greater understanding of emotional dynamics that you. In both the East and West his Mars is in Scorpio, so he knows how to use his feelings. You, on the other hand, aren’t comfortable with situations that are heavily emotional, and it’s easy for you to get manipulated, or to agree to do things that you’re not happy about. So understand your strengths and weaknesses. In the land of civilised logic you’re in control, in the land of chaotic emotion you’re probably at sea.
As far as what you should do is concerned, I think in the first instance you should tread carefully, at least until the end of January 2010. You should probably do what you can to help your husband with his career, and of course you should avoid discussing controversial subjects! Your kuja dosa will always be with you, but it might have been a particular problem since July of 2007. In September of this year things are likely to get better, but I’m not sure by how much.
I should also say that your husband needs grounding. In his Western chart he has no planets in Earth signs (i.e. Taurus, Virgo and Capricorn), so his attitude to money and material objects may sometimes be unhealthy. He might, for example, think money is important, but nonetheless he mightn’t properly understand it. So perhaps you can quite literally bring him down to earth, and make him feel comfortable with what he’s got.
To conclude, you’re fast approaching a time of change, when you have a chance to realise your full potential, and it’s important that nothing gets in your way. It’s also important that your marriage is a help and not a hindrance, and over the next couple of years you should give consideration to a range of possible actions.
I am a Scorpio and my boyfriend is a Capricorn. We are having a terrible fight because he went out of town for 4 days and I called him and I got no answer. I feel like I know him and I don’t think any foul play happened. But this was so out of character for him. So I have not been answering the phone, though we have been texting each other. I am so hurt by the incident and now he is trying to act like it was my fault. It’s so bad that I think we are about to end our 3 year relationship. How do I try to fix things without them going sour? - Tamikia, North Carolina
Tamikia, I’m not convinced that things are that bad. Yes, being a Scorpio you can get hurt when relationships don’t go to plan, and you perhaps find it difficult to express your feelings - they burn deep!
There was certainly aggravation in the past, but I believe that things are now blowing over. So I don’t think that there’s anything that needs to be done. Also, I think that the possibility of ‘foul play’ is an exaggeration!
Of course that doesn’t mean that everything is fine. Right now you don’t seem to have a great deal of power in the relationship, and you’ve perhaps been giving your boyfriend too much control. And maybe something quite major is getting in the way, and preventing you from relating properly to each other. You need to work out what it is, and decide whether or not you can sort it out. It’s possible that a financial issue is in play.
To finish on a positive note, something good is coming your way, which might have absolutely nothing to do with your boyfriend. Perhaps something that in the past you thought was hopeless, or was not worth pursuing, is coming back into focus. And although it has nothing to do with your relationship, it could nonetheless effect it, in a big way.